Thursday, April 20, 2017

amˈbɪʃ(ə)n/
noun
noun: ambition; plural noun: ambitions
1.    a strong desire to do or achieve something.
"her ambition was to become a pilot"
synonyms:
"her ambition was to become a model"
o    desire and determination to achieve success.
"young men and women with ambition"
synonyms:
informalget-up-and-go
"young people with ambition"
Origin

 If one were to decipher the definition of ambition and summarise it in a sentence or less, Google or the dictionary would probably present the above. However, if one were to decipher it in close association with real-time events and earthly emotions, one summarised sentence would never do, not only the word ambition, but any word justice in what they can connote. Denotation are the literal meaning of things, while connotations are associated closely with sides and personal objectives. To further this argument, one should look into the definitions of these words and test the effects of the definitions in real life.

To begin, we should look at the words denotation and connotation as separate entities with their own set of meanings.
denotation
diːnəʊˈteɪʃn/
noun
noun: denotation; plural noun: denotations
1.    the literal or primary meaning of a word, in contrast to the feelings or ideas that the word suggests.
o    the action of indicating or referring to something by means of a word, symbol, etc.
o    PHILOSOPHY
the object or concept to which a term refers, or the set of objects of which a predicate is true.
2.    connotation
3.  kɒnəˈteɪʃ(ə)n/
4.    noun
1.    an idea or feeling which a word invokes for a person in addition to its literal or primary meaning.
"the word ‘discipline’ has unhappy connotations of punishment and repression"
synonyms:
overtone, undertone, undercurrent, implication, hidden meaning, secondary meaning, nuance, flavour, feeling, aura, atmosphere, colouring, smack, hint, vein, echo, vibrations, association, intimation, suggestion, suspicion, insinuation; More
·         PHILOSOPHY
the abstract meaning or intension of a term, which forms a principle determining which objects or concepts it applies to.


While denotation is the literal meaning, connotation identifies itself with an idea or feelings in addition to its literal meanings. Idea and meanings are fluid and molded by earth life, therefore connotation can be safely described as the second layer to the meaning – the relation of the word in connotation to human life where humans are in control of this secondary layer.

How assuring it is to have a second layer to words that waivers our understanding of the universe? Should words not have a solid ground that is not fluid and ever changing, but that words should sought to have elements of proof in its meaning and the stability it can contribute in our world? Are humans inheritably powerful enough to command the world as it is, or is the world is truly the most powerful ruler where humans should succumb to its genius?

And who is to say words..are words? Whilst pondering the magnificent magnitude of our very existence, I have already managed to stray off from the original topic of ambition. At its finest, words carry the melody to our story, but at its worst, words silence.

But of course, this is just me, using connotation in all my words to get my ideas and feelings across. With every word I am manipulating a thought, and with every sentence I am seeking to establish manipulation as facts for others to understand. Evil, but detrimental. If it were not for the freedom of communication and thought, our world will have no leeway, but would operate under calculations and explanations of absolute stability without change. While that sounds like the ideal situation to surround yourself in, where everything can be proven or eliminated, the grey area where we all find comfort in disappears and we are left to be but of dust.

So let the dust settle, and let your ambitions bring you to where you need to be, whatever the word ambition can mean to you. Remember to use literal meaning and your own thoughts to paint the universe you want to live in. And finally, never let anyone else have the luxury of dictating your meaning.

Friday, April 15, 2011

i don't really know
what you are thinking right now
if i'm doing things right
if i chose the right person.



but i am going to work hard
to try and better understand you
be more compatible
and have you believe you chose the right person.



because the only reason i question if you are the one
is because i don't know if i am yours.

only youuuu...:)

Sunday, April 10, 2011

you watch the day turn into night
clear skies go cloudy
sheer bliss to misery
comfort to agony

the days of innocence
demise of the century
we live in the brutality of all truths

i see power turned over
raging at its inability to fulfill
failing miserably to find its place

as we wither away in the song of the winds
paddling on beyond our tears

we will fall
but we will prevail

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

sailing down the gondola

together we sail in a boat we call love
but you'd ask me
not to give anything up
not to include you in my plans

there are a lot of other things you say
such as
"i think we are going to work out"
"i think we are going to date a year or a year and a half"
"i don't think we are going to get married"

rantrantrant
blahblahblah

so in this ship we sail on
where nobody gives anything up
has an expected ending..

i have no idea
how to hold onto someone without sacrifice
i have no idea
what your working out means

in this ship we have
i think we are already sinking.
relationSHIP.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

simply at lost for words
hiding from the public eye
rolling on my comfort zone

i don't want to let you go.

i can't breathe.
this is so not worth it.

Monday, March 14, 2011

don't ever let go

writing about how much i don't want to see you go
in multiple outlets

i think.
no.

i know i've fallen.
deep.
in a short period of two months.
for what reasons?

i'm unsure myself

maybe it's because you remind me so much of him.
but at the same time you're everything he is not
and everything i want

who says there is a specific amount of time you have to go through before you fall in love?
i believe in love at first sight.

maybe i was not your love at first sight;
but maybe i can be your last love in sight..?

i am ranting
i really am

listening to you breathe right now
is like listening to my requiem

because even if we someday must part our ways
i'll always remember the sound of your breath
when you loved me,
and the sweet melody i fall asleep to.

and if we don't
then i die
with this breath
that lathered my life
with your love...

Saturday, March 05, 2011

boy.


there is this one person in your life
whoever this person may be

that you will have this undeniable connection.
to their emotions
to their behaviour
and to their current state of mind.


should we be afraid when we find this person?
they say we only run away from things we are really scared of
would sticking around mean
fear...?


but what would this fear be of.
the fear
to fall too deeply in love
of losing someone so dear
or losing yourself in the meantime?

we are so far apart
but we are still breathing the same air
living the same life
thinking the same things...

why did i go to sleep last night
with a lump in my throat?
why did i wake up this morning
with this lump at my heart?


because i knew
i sensed
something was wrong
something was out of the ordinary


but why now. why now.
why is our timing...always so oblivious


the better question is
after all that we have done to each other


how can we still be this connected

is the connection we have..
this sick, disgusting connection
the connection to each other's pain...


that forever binds us...?

Sunday, January 30, 2011

world love and life


our world
my world
same world
that twists my logic by day and night.

our love
my love
same love
that pounds nails straight into my heart.

our life
my life
same life
that lingers until death do us apart.

can i deny
this world
this love
this life
that brings upon so much pain
gracing us with the occasional presence of happiness?


can i surrender
this world
this love
this life
simply because it's the easier way out?

if world
love
life
can communicate with each other
and figure a way out to stop ruining each other hand in hand
could we brighten this world
love
life
with more smiles?


or is this too much to ask for.
communication for happiness.
too much.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

playing on emptiness

are you really just irresponsible
or did you simply forget about me already...?

i know it's only been so many days
and that we don't have enough to build on.
i am just blindly obeying my feelings..
and trusting that feelings

are sufficient
to us.

Tuesday, January 04, 2011

take a sip - it's our bitter life.




you know what's really hard?
pretending to be okay to the world
when you are crawling with bleeding knees.

the blood that leaves a trial of hope and dispair
whilst waiting for someone to clean this mess up
and something to numb the pain
becomes a process that everyone someday goes through
on different scales.

whether or not you make it alive
however, is an entirely different story.

Sunday, December 12, 2010


How long does it take to fall in love.
A second?
A day?
A month?
A year?

Can't we just follow our hearts.
And love.
And care about nothing else..


Monday, November 29, 2010

my lucky doughnut.


Even when you're tearing me apart
and screaming out our pain...
Our tears caress every inch of our face
showing comfort
and the understanding
of each others emotions...

Sometimes, this all seems to too good to be true
It's like a dream just being with you
Caz, baby I never thought that I'd get enough
But I'm satisfied and filled with just your love...

Friday, November 26, 2010

November 16th, 2010

I wrote this on November 16th.
I'm posting this up now


"driving home today was especially intriguing
simply beacause i was tired out of my mind
stressed out of my comfort zone
burning under sorrows
i was seeing real things and i thought i was being delusional
then something suddenly dawned on me

i feel so lucky
i know
l u c k y

i haven't felt this way in a long time
i don't even know what came to be
could it be the sudden realization that my life is about to restart very soon?
could it be that i am finding a balance between school and personal life?
could it simply be because i am allowing myself to believe that
for once

change is good?
i tell myself everyday that this is true
it's my mantra
but at the same time
is this truth a punishment to my heart and of my past?

i am so afraid
so afraid that
everything will turn chaotic
that everything i gained will all turn into swords and stab me
that everything i have learned will turn against me

i'm starting to wonder
if this is worth it
if this will ever happen
if.
i live in two worlds right now
one, where only we exist
two, where you don't exist.

whatever it is
i am t h a n k f u l
for having a shoulder to lean on
for having something to look forward to at the end of the day
for having something warm my dead heart

i wonder if we will expire
等
說不定這也是一種幸福的資格"
I guess this is what they call
Love.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

l o .. st.



I forgot how to express myself through words
because I am no longer a lost writer
who can't express her feelings through tears but can do so through words.

I am no longer a writer.
I am just a failure.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

the difference between what you want and reality


i want to

i really want to

but i can't

there are certain things

that just can't

so to that i toast

i toast my future

which ends starting everyday

Saturday, November 13, 2010

cause you're my everything.


i want to be everything but happy
so you can feel the pain that lingers in my presence
i want to be everything but beautiful
so you can pity and love the clarity of my heart and personality
i want to be everything but graceful

i want to be everything but truthful

i want to be everything but honest

i want to be your everything
and to be your everything

i don't know what it takes.

cause you're my everything.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

i should know

by now

that promises

compromises

and turns into a different promise

until someday

it either hurts you

or it just doesn't matter anymore.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Only Pain.

If this is beautiful
and this is love

Then what is horrible
and what is hate?

Concepts of love
Controversies of hate

Needing to love
Uncaring of hate

I can paint a picture with my emotions
love and hate is not present.

Only pain.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

I can't compare

When did I suddenly go from nothing to everything to something and to nothing and to something and onto everything and nothing and..onwards...

When did your smile turn into my every hope?
When did your touch turn into my every comfort?
When did your voice turn into my sweetest lullaby?


When did it start getting harder to breathe?

When did it start
and When will it end?