i don't really know
what you are thinking right now
if i'm doing things right
if i chose the right person.

but i am going to work hard
to try and better understand you
be more compatible
and have you believe you chose the right person.

because the only reason i question if you are the one
is because i don't know if i am yours.

only youuuu...:)

you watch the day turn into night
clear skies go cloudy
sheer bliss to misery
comfort to agony

the days of innocence
demise of the century
we live in the brutality of all truths

i see power turned over
raging at its inability to fulfill
failing miserably to find its place

as we wither away in the song of the winds
paddling on beyond our tears

we will fall
but we will prevail

sailing down the gondola

together we sail in a boat we call love
but you'd ask me
not to give anything up
not to include you in my plans

there are a lot of other things you say
such as
"i think we are going to work out"
"i think we are going to date a year or a year and a half"
"i don't think we are going to get married"

rantrantrant
blahblahblah

so in this ship we sail on
where nobody gives anything up
has an expected ending..

i have no idea
how to hold onto someone without sacrifice
i have no idea
what your working out means

in this ship we have
i think we are already sinking.
relationSHIP.

simply at lost for words
hiding from the public eye
rolling on my comfort zone

i don't want to let you go.

i can't breathe.
this is so not worth it.

don't ever let go

writing about how much i don't want to see you go

in multiple outlets

i think.

no.

i know i've fallen.

deep.

in a short period of two months.

for what reasons?

i'm unsure myself

maybe it's because you remind me so much of him.

but at the same time you're everything he is not

and everything i want

who says there is a specific amount of time you have to go through before you fall in love?

i believe in love at first sight.

maybe i was not your love at first sight;

but maybe i can be your last love in sight..?

i am ranting

i really am

listening to you breathe right now

is like listening to my requiem

because even if we someday must part our ways

i'll always remember the sound of your breath

when you loved me,

and the sweet melody i fall asleep to.

and if we don't

then i die

with this breath

that lathered my life

with your love...

boy.

there is this one person in your life
whoever this person may be

that you will have this undeniable connection.
to their emotions
to their behaviour
and to their current state of mind.

should we be afraid when we find this person?
they say we only run away from things we are really scared of
would sticking around mean
fear...?

but what would this fear be of.
the fear
to fall too deeply in love
of losing someone so dear
or losing yourself in the meantime?

we are so far apart
but we are still breathing the same air
living the same life

thinking the same things...

why did i go to sleep last night
with a lump in my throat?
why did i wake up this morning
with this lump at my heart?

because i knew
i sensed
something was wrong
something was out of the ordinary

but why now. why now.
why is our timing...always so oblivious

the better question is
after all that we have done to each other

how can we still be this connected

is the connection we have..
this sick, disgusting connection
the connection to each other's pain...

that forever binds us...?

world love and life

our world
my world
same world
that twists my logic by day and night.

our love
my love
same love
that pounds nails straight into my heart.

our life
my life
same life
that lingers until death do us apart.

can i deny
this world
this love
this life
that brings upon so much pain
gracing us with the occasional presence of happiness?

can i surrender
this world
this love
this life
simply because it's the easier way out?

if world
love
life
can communicate with each other
and figure a way out to stop ruining each other hand in hand
could we brighten this world
love
life
with more smiles?

or is this too much to ask for.

communication for happiness.
too much.

playing on emptiness

are you really just irresponsible
or did you simply forget about me already...?

i know it's only been so many days
and that we don't have enough to build on.

i am just blindly obeying my feelings..
and trusting that feelings

are sufficient

to us.

take a sip - it's our bitter life.

you know what's really hard?
pretending to be okay to the world
when you are crawling with bleeding knees.

the blood that leaves a trial of hope and dispair
whilst waiting for someone to clean this mess up
and something to numb the pain
becomes a process that everyone someday goes through
on different scales.

whether or not you make it alive
however, is an entirely different story.